Category: BEST POSITIVE PSYCH

Best ideas of positive psychology: happiness, intuition, optimism, health, flow, decision-making, mind and body, goals, habits, great living!

You Just Ate Our Conversation

Posted on by Senia

I heard a talk today on mindful eating. The woman who spoke described how we take in experiences, how we eat experiences.

She said we are always eating. We are always taking in experiences, things around us, and we can choose how we take in things around us. We can choose the way that makes us less stressed, and we can choose the way that makes us more alive.

This sounds to me like Tonya Pinkin’s philosophy that how you do anything is how you do everything.

One other thing the woman said about mindful eating is kind of like the Zen of the Motorcycle (i.e. if your engine’s not starting, look to see where else in life you’re not getting started). Today’s woman’s point was that if we have strange eating habits, like particular snacking, or not eating breakfast, or not sitting down to eat – then where else might we be “snackin” on life, or not preparing for the day, or not giving enough time to ourselves?

How you do anything is how you do everything.

“The Science of Happiness” workshop in Greenwich, CT (Wed, 5-16-07)

Posted on by Senia

I’ll be teaching a class on Wednesday in Greenwich, CT.
WHEN: 7-9pm
WHERE: Greenwich High School
REGISTER: Here (preferred) or at-the-door.

The Science of Happiness

In 1998, Positive Psychology was launched by then American Psychological Association president Martin Seligman. Positive Psychology is a branch of psychology that studies what makes people happier, more productive, and more successful . What is this new “science of happiness”? In this two-hour workshop, we will go through the basics of the science of happiness and its applications to your life. We will cover physical happiness, mental happiness, emotional happiness, and self happiness. Some particular topics that we will address:

* How does optimism increase focus and affect physical health?
* You are what you say: how can you respond to people most effectively, how can you praise people and children well?
* How can you open up your creativity and decision-making skills?

* How can you create new successful habits?

Senia Maymin, MBA, MAPP, is an Executive Coach and Editor-in-Chief of Positive Psychology News Daily (www.pos-psych.com). In addition to coaching, she has a background in high-tech and finance. She completed her AB in Mathematics and Economics at Harvard University, her MBA at Stanford University, and her Master in Applied Positive Psychology at the University of Pennsylvania (Martin Seligman’s program, the only such master’s degree in the world). Website: www.Senia.com.

The Brain Yearning to Find a Path

Posted on by Senia

About how Beethoven created Ode to Joy and heard it in his head even when he was deaf (he had mapped hearing so well in his brain):

“[Beethoven] heard it in a way that demonstrates our hunger for human adaptability. … The brain yearning to find a path to the outside world.”

~ John Hockenberry, journalist
At the human2.0 conference at the MIT Media Lab, ten minutes ago.

Marketing to the top people in the field

Posted on by Senia

My favorite Seth Godin post so far this year:

[Rather than helping beginners get better at something,] you’re way better off helping the perfect improve. You’ll also sell a lot more management consulting to well run companies, high end stereos to people with good stereos and yes, church services to the already well behaved.

With Positive Psychology News Daily, we’re targeting people who work in and do research in Positive Psychology as well as people new to the field (“What is Positive Psychology?“) This Seth post is illuminating to me because yes, the people who get most excited about what we’re doing on Pos-Psych.com are the people passionate about the field to begin with: our best comment discussion people, our best guest articles, our best email responses – all come from people in the field and in the process of expanding the field!

Business Game #001: The Most Motivating Question

Posted on by Senia

Did you ever read The Most Dangerous Game? (Here it is if you want a fun 10-minute action-packed story).

Well, today, we’re all about the MOST MOTIVATING QUESTION. What question will get you excited, get you moving, and get you pumped?

In fact, if we want to look at it cynically, we can ask, “What is a question that well-polished motivational speakers ask the audience in order to get audience members convinced to follow the motivational speaker’s system?” I.e., this is an effective question because it can change the mood, expectations, and actions of the listener.

Let’s look at the components of such a mysterious question:
1) It will fill you with positive emotions such as happiness, awe, engagement – which is important because when you’re on an emotional high, you are more open to looking at broader solutions, according to research by Barbara Fredrickson.
2) It will energize you – important because then you can turn the question into action. “People who are persuaded verbally that they possess the capabilities to master given activities are likely to mobilize greater effort and sustain it than if they harbor self-doubts and dwell on personal deficiencies when problems arise,” says Albert Bandura.
3) It will make you feel confident – important because confidence is just about a mix of self-esteem and personal control, and these are two of four inner traits of happy people according to Ed Diener and David Myers.

So…. what is such a question?
—–

The Most Motivating Question GAME

When: When you want to motivate a person or people.

  • At the start of a meeting
  • In setting up a healthy mindset for a close friend or family to take action on his/her issue
  • In starting to work with colleagues on a project

The Players: You and one or more people.

The Rules: Ask the question in a warm, open tone. If everyone if is a rush, preface the question with, “Before we figure out this particular solution, let’s see…”

The Question Itself:

WHAT ARE WE ALREADY DOING RIGHT?

Variations: “What are we doing right so far in this project?”
“Before we figure out this particular solution,
let’s see what we’re already doing right.”

You don’t want to lose what you’re already doing right when you move to do something else. Additionally, this creates:
1) a positive tone and gets everyone to think about the situation as a team,
2) energy because something something is already not-broken, and
3) confidence because without any didactic explanation, you’ve shown the team that they have already done things right before.

It’s that simple. What are we doing right already?
See Doug Turner’s article on using this question to open meetings.

This question leads to productive discussions:

  • “You want to become a better salesperson. What are you already doing right? What if you did more of that?”
  • “You want to race in the Master’s class cycling track finals. What are you already doing right in your training? What other things can you do to complement this training?”
  • “You want to spend more quality time with your kids. What are you already doing right? How can you add to what you’re doing while keeping what you’re already doing right?”

What are you doing right today? :)
Enjoy the game. Play often, see how people react.

No Butter on Mondays :)

Posted on by Senia

I’ve been on a health kick recently. And part of my health kick is eating bread on the weekends only – so no bread on weekdays. I really love fresh bread, so I tend to have a bit of it on the weekends. And I have bread with a thick swab of butter on it.

And then … the funny thing that happens is that the weekend is over, but on Monday I still crave butter.

Why do I crave butter on Mondays, and what can I do about it?

I’m asking more generally, how can you create a new habit for yourself such as:

  • Exercising on Monday when you’ve lounged the weekend away, or – better yet – spent it in a daze in front of the TV.
  • Prioritizing better at work after overloading yourself with to-do’s and promises to people.
  • Skipping the additional candy when you just want to reach for it in the bowl at the office.

You’d better create some new mental pathways!

We spoke here about Ann Graybiel’s research that new habits come about when a new neural pathway is strong enough. And we spoke here about the benefit of daily practice toward achieving anything in life.

That’s what happens on Mondays. Your old neural pathways want to kick in. Especially if you used to eat butter on any old day of the week, and now you’re limiting yourself to the weekends.

So what can you do to counteract that strong urge, that mental temptation?

1) As Ann Graybiel says, do not allow yourself trigger situations. Don’t go into a bar if you’re getting sober. Don’t have M&M’s in the house if you have a no-chocolate resolution. Don’t have butter in your home – always go out to have butter.

2) And her second suggestion, make the new habit stronger than the first habit. Create stronger, more firm new neural pathways. Make the old habits into a piece of thread, and the old habits as reinforced as a thick sailor’s rope.

And the funniest thing – daily practice. Each time you say “no” to something you don’t want and say “yes” to something you want, you are increasing the chances of being able to say “yes” to the good habit again later, you are increasing self-regulation.

Happy daily practicing of your best habits!

Rules and Decisions

Posted on by Senia

“Too many rules get in the way of leadership. They just put you in a box . . . . People set rules to keep from making decisions.”

“The truth is that many people set rules to keep from making decisions. Not me. I don’t want to be a manager or a dictator. I want to be a leader—and leadership is ongoing, adjustable, flexible, and dynamic. As such, leaders have to maintain a certain amount of discretion.”

~ Mike Krzyzewski (Coach K)

Senia on public radio’s “Fair Game” program

Posted on by Senia
Today, I was a guest on the FairGame radio program hosted by Faith Salie. Listen to the 6-minute segment of my interview HERE.

The interview was in reaction to this NYTimes article: Russia’s government mandate to broadcast at least 50% good news? You might think that a Positive Psychologist might support something like that, but Faith was fairly surprised at my answer … enjoy the interview.

The program aired tonight at 8pm on about 25 stations nationwide.

This was a fun interview to do, and I wish Faith, her producers, and the whole program huge success. After looking at her name and photo several times, I realized Faith was a year ahead of me at Harvard undergrad. We were in the same house – Leverett House.